The Unanswerable Question

“So, what do you want?”

Fresh out of college and my first reaction to this question is, “Oh, yeah, I guess I should know that.” And I’m not going to hide from it–I really should know this. The thing is I know what I want. It just doesn’t mold to peoples expectation.

I want a porch with a view that is untouched by man, a chair that’s positioned in the shade, a coffee cup in my left hand and a book in my right. I want hours to contemplate and to write. I want to sit atop a mountain and see a vast existence.

I want a lot of things, but when people ask “what do you want?” they’re asking what job do you want. Although my first reaction to that is, “I don’t care as long as I’m happy,” it’s not  going to be a real answer.

I see my life as a road of question marks, but ones I’m happy to uncover. I know I love to write–if my career leads me to this full time, great, but if it doesn’t that’s okay because I’ll still continue in it even if I can’t live off doing it. I live my life with one main objective–to  live obediently to God (and Lord knows I screw up plenty of times). I try to remind myself “In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths” (Proverbs 3:6). I can’t say it’s an easy way to live, I’m always wondering if I’m making the wrong choice or using patience as an excuse.

So what I should really be asked is, “How will you get to what you want?” and for me, that’s unanswerable.

One thought on “The Unanswerable Question

  1. Pingback: The Unanswerable Question — The Memoir Of A Writer – cathlucy

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s